My Real Life Teenage Love Story Part 2(Sophomore Year)

The new year started, and by now I was becoming comfortable with being in public school. There was no guy I was interested, a few caught my eye but nothing serious. Blake dated a couple girls, all 2 years younger than us and I couldn't understand why. He began texting me again like normal, we were just friends and he would tell me when he was going out on dates. He had no idea that I had never been on a date with anyone in my entire life, I wasn't even sure if he knew that my previous boyfriend had been my first and only boyfriend ever. Somehow I managed watching him date these other girls, telling myself I didn't like him that way and we were just friends. I mean the other girls didn't go to our school, to me they were out of sight and out of mind, it was finally just me and my best friend again. Until it happened. He started dating a girl one year ahead of us, and I had to watch as he walked with her down the hallway instead of me, but the worst art I didn't even think of until I saw it. He walked her to class...and kissed her right in front of me. I could have died of jealousy right then and there. By now I knew I had some feelings for him, but something was holding me back, I knew I wasn't ready. I was throughly depressed after that, but I survived. Then they broke up, and being the good friend I am, I encouraged him to try again with her because I knew they were good together. So he did, but it didn't last long and finally they were over. It was just me and Blake again.Until...

Blake was absent from school one day. There had been this guy (once again he doesn't need to be named) that I had formed a crush on, and I had suspicions that he liked me too. Well after lunch each day my friends and I would gather in this one corner of the Commons Area and talk, play around, hang out etc. I was just standing there and out of no where my crush walked up to me, and at that exact moment someone bumped him and he fell into me. His lips touching mine for a split second. Strange as it was, my first kiss.Sort of, I'm still not sure if I count it or not. I told all of my friends not to tell Blake, but sure enough the next day once he was back, one of them slipped up at lunch. I don't remember exactly how it was said , but at the table someone made a comment about "Yeah like with happened with Jessy and ---- yesterday", then I had to explain. Blake couldn't understand why I hadn't told him. I wanted to protect him from the same hurt that he had unknowingly inflicted on me by all his girlfriends.

Within 2 weeks time, my crush and I had been talking alot more. After school one day. Blake and I had a student club meeting, and afterwards my crush had been hanging out around school too. It was the 3 of us walking around school talking,and it happened. Blake walked down the hallway to get his bag, and my crush asked me out. He held my hand walking down the hallway and told Blake. I was so happy, and so mortified. I knew Blake liked me, and now he had to confront me and my boyfriend face to face, happy with another guy that wasn't him. I felt aweful for him, but at the same time I felt like it was payback. The next day, my new boyfriend and I were the cutest happy couple, although in the hallway I saw him once and he ignored me, I thought it was strange. But after lunch in the commons area, he was always hugging me, and holding my hand. To my despair, Blake hung out with a different group far away from me. I knew he must have been upset, but I missed him, and it seemed like all I could talk abotu was him. Even to my boyfriend. Blake was my closest friend and I didn't have anything else to talk about so he was always my main topic.

The next day I stayed home sick from school, it was October 30th. I don't remember if Greg (my boyfriend, I've decided it's too hard to write this without his name) had called me, I don't think he did. The next morning I got to school at 7am, it was still dark out and the sun was slowly rising. He was standing outside waiting for me. I walked up to him and he said we needed to talk. He explained to me how his ex-girlfriend had called him the night before and wanted to work things out. She wanted to meet him at the high school football game that night, our school was playing her school and she was on the dance team. He broke up with me, and I told him it was fine because we had only dated for 3 days and they had dated for 9 months. (which seemed to be a long time then, but pathetic compared to my current relationship of nearly 16 months with Blake) It was the morning of my favorite holiday, October 31st, Halloween. Luckily my friend Lauren arrived and I immediately used her as an excuse to leave before the tears welled up in my eyes. I felt pathetic. I had only ever had 2 relationships and both lasted less than half a month. Later on Blake told me that supposedly Greg had been talking to and kissed Blake's ex-girlfriend on the bus on the way home from school.That night I sat at home alone (with my mom but might as well have been alone) while everyone was out enjoying the holiday of the night. I watched "scary" movies on Disney channel, and texted Blake who was out trick or treating with his nephews and hating every minute of it. Or at least he said so to make me feel better. But nevertheless, time moved on and so did I. Or so I thought.

In the week or so after our break up, I found myself staying afterschool again with some friends including Blake. Bu they all left, and incidentally Greg stayed after school to. He stopped me in the hallway (where I was about to leave since all my friends had) and told me he was sorry for how things wen with us, and told me he regretted it, and he felt like he messed up something good because he thought we were great together. I told him not to worry about it, and told him we could still be friends. He told me that we could, but kept bringing up the issue of "us". We walked towards the front school doors (the school is virtually empty since it's long after regular hours) and I looked up at him to tell him goodbye, and he did it. He kissed me, long and deep, and actually went in straight for a french kiss, which I thought was nasty (now I don't but looking back he was bad at it, so that's why it was bad). I don't remember what we said afterwards but it had happened. I kissed a guy who had so unexpectedly broken up with me. It was my first real kiss, but not the way I had ever imagined.

A week or so after, in late November, I found myself staying after school for another club meeting with Blake. Instead, we didn't have a meeting we had to help unload boxes of fruit for the chorus fundraiser, and Greg was staying after in chorus. Blake helped unload and there was nothing for me to do. It was raining and someone had handed me and umbrella even though I was under an overhang. Suddenly Greg came over, picked me up and kissed me. I was happy for some reason, but hoped Blake didn't notice. Then after that I found myself in the commons area with a friend of mine, and I kept repeatedly kissing him. Looking back I could have just beat the crap out of myself, but at the time I didn't care. My friend left, and Greg was about to, he walked to the door, turned around then came back and kissed me. Then left. I didn't know what was wrong with me. How could the one girl thats always safeguarded herself so well, have done something so stupid? After that everything with Greg and myself was over, we became totally estranged to each other. I was heartbroken but once again in a week or 2 I was over it. And then came late December where my attentions finally turned where they were always meant to be...


Me, close to the time all this happened.